Don't Run With Scissors

It may happen during your lifetime that you need to peel some onions. As a man you are (if you’re a woman just pretend it) you don’t know tears. Tears are for little girls and maybe very ill dogs.
So how do you peel an onion without bursting in tears? There are several methods already known by everyone (except you).
Your granny perhaps told you about lighting a candle near the onion and singing Elton John’s “don’t let the sun go down on me”. Well, let me warn you this doesn’t work.
It won’t work either if you try to peel the onions with your nails like a retard (I did this).
The best fucking way to peel and cut onions without losing fluids and valuable minerals through your eyes is cutting it in half, removing the top and bottom parts, and peeling the usable parts under running water. Then cut it from safe distance. Imagine it’s a bomb about to go off. Pick the knife like a cheerleader grabbing poo, but chop/slice/murder the onion as if you were a chef (which you aren’t, because chefs already know how to do this shit).

This video is weirdness filled with a mix of epic and WTF. And also the word fuck like a thousand times. But fuck him, fuck the video, and fuck everything. I don’t give a chainsaw. (just watch it)

People are wondering if we are in front of Google’s ruin. My opinion, as I just commented at Google Blogoscoped, is as follows:
It won’t happen soon. But it will, for sure.
Probably not because of this drifts, but because of technology and needs moving onto more relevant sources of information: social networks and other kind of streams.
Indeed, it’s a very interesting shift. At first we didn’t have indexed the web. Then search engines came in, and we had access to every corner of the internet. And now we need more: we have the chance to rely on people we know or trust (or on people known or trusted by our contacts) and consume information through this “fast-food network”.
It is going to be the end of Google, yes. But we are just at the beginning of the end. They will be around for a good time more.
But Facebook is reaching first place quickly, and they will strike hard next week with the announcement of email service.
In my opinion, Google needs to make a bold move and go all-in with Buzz, implementing it right into search results pages, while making Buzz behave like a really powerful social network.
What they did pushing it into Gmail was a dumb move. Facebook is currently on everybody’s mail, every day, and people actually care about what happens there. But they achieved this by being useful. Google did that once too, but now they think users are “their personal army” and they can make something succeed just because they have the userbase.
Winds of change around here! For sure.

I found this wise ilustration lost in a dusty folder, and I think it deserves to be shared.